Hair Talk!

The Myth about Nits

2h ago

In my 2017 Blog posts, I’m going to talk about lots of things that I have experience in. As a qualified Master Hairdresser, I will be able to give you lots of hints and tips in hair problems and solutions;

Today’s problem is all about nits. As I’ve just spent the whole of December (and the first week back in school)  treating my 12 year old daughter’s massive head of thick hair for head lice, I want to clear up a common myth. Head lice is not only attracted to clean hair, it is attracted to any hair, but it most likely can gain Easy entry to dirty, smelly, unruly, tangled hair and not smoothly brushed Clean hair!

Yes, it’s easy for a lice to jump heads while close to another child, but it’s the tangled hair that it gets to grip onto! So, even boys who have a good head of hair can get them, if their hygiene is not up to scratch! Yes, people are basically being nice to avoid any embarrassment, so now you know!

So, what works? I tried the natural home remedy first which is really good, dose the hair in vinegar, leave on for twenty minutes, (whilst in the bath is really good) and then shampoo as normal. You really need to have a fine comb for the next step. Lucky you if your child has fine hair, but if your child is like mine with thick, long, flowing locks, this is going to take you about an hour to thoroughly comb through and rid the head of lice. And also, if your child has sensory issues, this is going to kill her and you as the smell isn’t great. But it is a very good home method as it is easy and inexpensive. You should also do this treatment the following week also.

Mayo-naise is also very good, but the trick here is to smother the hair in thick mayo and then fine comb the nits and lice out, it’s very messy and again, time consuming but worth it! Again, it needs to be repeated the following week.

There are many chemical products on the market for around 14 euros and my favourite is Lyclear. This works really well but I did find that I had to repeat it the following week and despite the added expense for parents, it is quite harsh on the scalp leaving it dry and flaky and itchy!

So, why did it take me so long to finally rid my daughter’s hair of lice if I had been doing all of these methods? I’m going to be very honest here, I’m nearly fifty and even with my glasses, it’s very hard to see these little critters and the nits (which are the eggs) so I wasn’t a hundred percent sure if I was getting them all. The nits can look like dry scalp! So I totally understand if busy parents can’t see these little bugs and the kids do also have to stay still for at least five minutes so that you can actually check the hair properly. And we all know how difficult that is! (The best place to check your child’s hair is in natural sunlight!) I also feel that this particular strain of lice are quite resistant to the chemical treatments that I have used. There is a theory that they have become used to the chemicals and are not been killed by them and I believe this. And the other thing is, my daughter was also catching them again by other class mates. And that is just the way school is. Kids mix and huddle. And you can’t stop that and you don’t want to either!

So, what I would say to all you nurturers out there, just pick up a bottle of vinegar in your grocery shopping for three weeks in a row and dose each of your children’s hair with vinegar, before normal washing. And simply fine comb the bad guys out. You will be surprised at what you find! But please don’t let squeamishness put you off. xxx Jean

Christmas once again! Thank you God!

Ok, I know it's the most stressful time of the year for Mam's and Dad's! There is so much to do, so many presents to buy and all the bills still have to be paid, but if we're still wrapping presents, we are still here able to do it. And that's got to be a good thing?
2016 was a tough year for all. I personally found since January 1st till now a challenging year. There were so many things that I had to focus on doing well these last twelve months, being a kind Wife, a patient Mother, a trusting child of God, a loyal friend and family member and a good neighbor. And all this with the added stresses of everyday living with health and financial challenges, like you all out there. It was a slippery slope of learned behavior I can admit! Because that is what life's about, making mistakes and learning from them. We all know when we do something awful, we cringe and think, 'I'll never do that again!' And you don't, because the guilt kills you! My own conscience is my strict teacher!
Many friends and family have passed away this year and last, some way before their time. I lost my two dogs Skye and Sully who I miss every day, so I can only imagine the pain of losing a child or a partner for ever.
I think of my own Dad who was powerless of his own demise ten years ago so he surrendered to God, even though he wasn't ready. He was just beginning to enjoy life. He hadn't made all his amends. But his time was up. So, I look at his life and try and learn from it. He may not have thought that he had achieved much in his life, but he did. He was a Dad, so he was a teacher. And he gave some great lessons!  I like to think of him now enjoying Christmas in Heaven in a forever peace, which is a wonderful state of mind to be in, Peace.
One of the best things that I did this year? Was organizing the Carol service over in the horse stables with all of the children happily singing carols in aid of the homeless. Another mammy who helped me  had so recently lost her own daughter, yet she finds comfort in helping others.
The kids were so happy to do their bit in raising toiletries for the Simon Community who will now be able to provide sanitary items for the people who live on the streets. It's not going to save these poor people but it may just save the kids who sang for them.
To teach your child to give to others is such a valuable thing. To help others without question.
So maybe Christmas is coming faster for a reason? At Christmas time, people make more effort in giving and after January rolls in, then February, it's all about us again and holidays and living.
And there's nothing wrong with that either! Life is for living.
My Mam says all the time to me and my sisters, 'Be positive, be grateful!'And she's right, it may not change your circumstances, but it will help your state of life and mind.
Life is hard work for everybody but I suppose if it was easy we might get bored. I have never been bored! I sometimes look to the sky and shout, 'Can I be bored please for just one minute!?"
But I am beginning to laugh at myself. I am funny! I do stupid things alot!
I think that is the biggest mistake I made so far in my life. That it is a serious life.
It's not a serious life and it's not a joke either,
'It's a wonderful life!'
Jean xxx

What Dyspraxia means to me

I ran a marathon in my house this morning, or at least it feels like that. My twelve year old daughter woke me up at 5.30 this morning. It was a cold dark morning and I really wanted to stay snuggled up in bed to finish off my lovely deep sleep. Instead, I go into her room and get in beside her, lest she wakes up the whole house and to hopefully keep her in bed for another hour at least. But she's a scratcher. And the minute she's starts scratching and squirming about, I know we're up.
This will happen all the way to Christmas time because the minute she wakes, she can't help feeling excited about the festive season. And she wants to be awake lest she misses anything relating to the same.
She loves Christmas!
Probably more than Santa and the Elves themselves!
So, I take the opportunity to groom her. I'll need two hours at least so this works grand this morning before school, Friday, the last day of the week.
She is just in the middle of her third period and there is blood everywhere. She coped quite well on the discovery of a period beginning at age twelve because she knows it happens to all girls. This makes her the same, not different, which she is happy enough about.
I had noticed her body growing and changing rapidly this year and I was praying that she would be older when her period came. Although she has the same body as other twelve year old girls, her organization and management skills are still aged seven. She has Dyspraxia.
Don't get me wrong, this is not a 'poor pet' story.
 Under her heading of Dyspraxia, she has comprehension and learning difficulties and hyper active behavior but because she has had a lot of help from Dyslexia teaching, Occupational therapy, Speech and language support and pony lessons since an early age, she is doing really well.
I am pretty sure that she can reach her milestones like any other child, albeit a little later than most.
So, I looked at my daughter this morning. I'm going to de-lice her hair again for the third week in a row, pretty confident I'm going to get the last of the nits that have been lurking about. She has a massive thick head of hair which is why it took as long to treat the little devils! I'm using the home remedy this morning of smothering her hair in Mayo and some extra vinegar to be sure. I have used the chemical the week previous, but this method is quite good also. It takes me about 45 minutes to fine comb her whole head which is not easy at 6.30 in the morning especially with the cries of pain from my daughter, oh yes, she has sensory issues too which is the biggest pain in the neck for me and for her too, I know. She hates the feeling of water or soap or anything on her skin. Wonderful.
Her face has the usual puberty spots and blackheads so I've found this lovely t-tree mask in the body shop and gently spread it over her face, she doesn't like that either.
Her nails are long and are caked with dirt so I trim them and her toes to her squeals of torture. I then get her pretty little pink shaver and groom her bits below and underneath her arms. She finds this very funny. (I tell her, I'm the only person who can do this for her) What next, oh yes, she has braces in and because she doesn't like to use the little interdental brushes on them I do them for her once or twice a week. This is the worse pain of all for her but as I said to her this morning, 'It's just as well that I don't fall for the crocodile tears because you would be left scruffy!'
I'm not sure I made the right decision for braces. This has added torturous work onto myself!
She also has sinus problems, but because we do a salt nasal wash each morning, she needs less antibiotics! She's pretty good at this because she knows it really helps!
So then to the shower! I scrub her thick hair twice then rinse and condition through torturous screams and then we're done. I cover her wet skin in silcocks base and then dry it off. This reduces her itchy skin.
I brush out the tangled hair adding the wonderful revlon detangling spray which really does work and she's wrapped up in her cosy dressing gown in the warm sitting room at 8.30 just in time for a good breakfast, of brown bread toast, cheese and chicken and a fresh fruit smoothie, which also helps keep her bowels regular each morning before school, which helps her feel comfortable for the day. If she's comfortable, she's able to concentrate a bit better!
Good nutrition is really important for children with learning difficulties and coupled with her omega 3,6, and 9, she's off to a good start.
I then get myself ready and pack her lunch while sipping a coffee. I have a clean uniform ready for her as because she has now started to smell, so has her clothes! By 9.10 we're all set to go to school which starts at 9.20, (after changing her pad twice and making sure it is comfortable!) I pack some wipes and pads for changes which I'm sure she takes about 20 minutes each time in the school toilet! She has a new male teacher and I'm sure he thinks she has a very weak bladder or bowel!
I do have to remind her to check the toilet seat for blood when she's finished and to make sure she wraps her old pad up and puts it in her bag. I know she will get this eventually.
She is organized and managed.
The school will then look after the rest.
I get back home and can now tackle my house, my dogs and spend some time with my other daughter who is off from college today and needs me to do a few errands with her and maybe have lunch.
And my day is gone.
I think I used to have more hours in my day when I was working full time. Or maybe I just have more things to do now that I'm close to fifty. Life seems to be busier.
I admire the women who can work and take care of their children also.
Being a mother is not for the faint hearted!
Jean xx

Depression

When you're in depression, you look too bad for the world to see you. You don't go to the doctor to tell him because he can't help. Talking doesn't help. Your mind has a flu that prevents your body working and it has to try heal itself and replenish. That's depression.

Man's best friend

A lover of dogs all of my life, our family has always had one or two around us. And I have to say, they were a wonderful addition to our life. As I grew over the years, I learned more about having a dog as a pet and I was able to give them more of what they needed, love, exercise, food and plenty of family interaction. In return , I received loving, loyal pets.
When we brought our first husky into our home nine years ago, we called her Skye because of her beautiful blue eyes. She also had a sandy coloured coat. Skye was a very good puppy from the start, she house trained really well and behaved like a Royal lady in our home. She was so regal. Skye was to be the leader or Alpha female of our other dogs. She would take all their food first and all of their bones and toys. She would want the first hugs from us as she came into the kitchen each morning. She loved playing with Pongo, our King Charles, because he was clever enough to let her be boss. She constantly picked on Buster, our West Hiland terrior, because he was dumb enough to try to hold his own corner. Sadly, five years ago, those two little guys passed on and Skye had sole rights over her kingdom.
She was really cute. She loved rubber balls, to eat. It was the strangest thing, she just loved to eat rubber! Every squeaky toy or ball would soon be demolished by Skye. She would be all excited at the thoughts of her delight.
Thinking she might need a pal we brought home Storm, a seven month old huskie with one blue eye and one brown. He had a black and white coat. His owners were a young couple who were emigrating and they had given him lots of love. So we had no worries about bringing this guy among our own seven year old daughter. Storm was so funny. We definitely thought that he had ADHD because he was so hyper and anxious. He almost talked to you in a moany type howl, to let you know what he wanted. He needed lots of exercise and runs without a lead. He was so happy to be given the luxury of regular runs by the beach, in the mountains or whereever we went, that he rewarded us with    great loyalty. He always checked if he could see me on our walks.

We brought our third huskie into our lives two and a half years ago. He had been on tv3 from dogs    
trust looking for a home. He was the only white one of the liter and he was deaf in one ear. Of course
we had to have him and we fell immediately in love with him. We called him Solas or 'sully' for short. He was the most adorable little guy.
 Skye took to him like he was her puppy and Storm was happy enough to have a new pal to play with
In the first few months, it did appear that he was deaf as he didn't seem to here us, but Yasmin and Sarah spent all their time playing with him and loving him and then it seemed he was able to here as he was able to follow instructions in the house or outside. He would here a biscuit wrapper open instantly and I was amazed as I knew he had a great eye sense.
I figured in the last while that he only had one deaf ear as they lay flat on our walks while the other stood up always on the alert.
Three huskies are very strong to handle on walks but it didn't deter me. I took them everywhere and ran them freely in the fields beside me. They loved running in the fields and chased each other around playfully. I just had to be careful they didn't knock me down as they ran back and forward around me.
They're strength would be the same as a motor bike if they hit you on full speed!

Skye was the boss and young Sully would chase her everywhere. Unfortunately he chased after her  this past January into the main road from the far end of the field. I heard him Yelp in pain and I initially thought he had ran into a trap of a sort as I didn't realise they could get out into the road, but my heart ached when I walked towards his squeals and saw him hobble back into field with his leg dangling. Once he realised I saw him, he stopped where he was in obvious pain.
I had to run into the road and get him help as I couldn't carry him myself and a lovely old man and a young chap came to help me. I was devastated that my little guy was in so much pain and I feared that he would lose the leg. But thankfully, although the vet told me the leg was smashed, he did a great job in an operation and had him as good as knew in a few months. He was so cute with his bandaged leg and relished all the extra attention from Yasmin if that was possible as she loved him already so much. We left him sleep in the kitchen from then on because we didn't want the other guys to rough play with him. Each morning I came into the kitchen and he would be there wagging his tail
waiting for his hugs. I would say, 'where's the baby? Where's the baby?' He would stand up beside me
and hug my legs. When I let the other two in, they would all run for a place at my legs, delighted to   see me and get a hug.                                                                                                                                    

We realised in the past couple of years that Skye was a hunter. She liked to catch rabbits, cats and other small animals and one time while I was walking her in the fields, I saw her grab a baby calf into the ditch. She was just about to go at it and Sully was right behind her and Storm came too, but I let such a racket the dogs left her and the calf was able to escape unharmed. I talked the the farmer after that and he kindly told me to just keep them away during calf season. Once the calves were big enough they would be well able for the dogs.
I was very grateful and did what he asked.
I had been walking them on the lead for a good while and a lovely lad from our road also walked them fro me. They loved to see him coming. They knew he would have treats for them after their
walk.
I went back to the field this past Wednesday. The dogs were so excited and ran into the field excitedly and then that's when two of my dogs prescious lives ended.
It all happened so quickly. Skye ran off ahead of me with Sully at her heals. Storm was running and jumping rough the growth playfully. I followed the other two into the patchy field behind the secondary school. It wasn't ideal for a long run, but it was better than a walk on a lead.
I knew Skye and Sully would be way ahead me now, possibly looking for pheasant or wild rabbits. To my dismay, I saw a sheep. There had never been sheep there before and my dogs had never been in an area where there were sheep, but I knew Skye had gone for one. I could here branches breaking in the bushes before me but I didn't have the guts to in after them. I thought if they had a sheep in the last four minutes it would be too late. I took Storm home and called for help. I knew if my dogs had a sheep that they would have to be put down . But I wanted it done quickly humanely.
Instead, the farmer hit my dogs with a shovel and sent them running off scared. And it was a couple
of more hours till they were actually put down , but I know my dogs knew that something bad was going to happen to them.
I am actually an animal lover and sympathise with the poor sheep also. I explained to my heartbroken
children that unfortunately, we couldn't have our dogs if we weren't able to control them and they had become wild. And acts like that from dogs scare people. Would they turn on a newborn baby?
But, it is the saddest thing.
I feel that I failed my dogs in giving them so much freedom. The only comfort we have is knowing that while they were in our family, they were so loved and cherished.
 That every moment of their life was happy and fulfilling and they gave us so much love.
Jean xxx

First Radio Interview!

Hey!

My first radio interview will be hosted by Brenda Donahue on RTE Radio 1 on Wednesday 6th July 2016 at 10pm.
It's about our success and during the Celtic Tiger and then our losses when the recession hit.
My nervous break-down,
How we coped with our family and friends support!
And how I discovered my new path of writing!
Please listen!
Jean xxx

The Wedding!

My son's wedding day arrived at super speed on Saturday 23rd April 2016.
I was going to be 'The Mother of the Groom!' I was quite excited to tell you the truth. It's no small task being mother of the groom. I know the better title is 'Mother of the Bride!' But I have to be grateful for small pickings. And my rival, 'Mother of the Bride' is a lovely woman so we were going to sail along on the day itself like the perfectly organised pair we were.
It had been an emotional roller coaster ever since the engagement ring was placed on the fiancee all the way up till my son said 'I do!'
He's a tense lad is our son, a little bit shy and anti-social and a small bit moody,  (He get's that side of his personality from his Dad!) So, as much as I was trying to be a helpful, non-pushy, non-busybody Mother, the little fecker wouldn't let me do anything! (At 49, I'm probably just too young to be Mother of the Groom! So we clashed! A lot! lol) But I trudged along like any good Irish Mother worth their salt would! With the determination of a Spirit that couldn't be broken!
For three whole weeks I cleaned my house while my hubby did the repairs and my brother in law did the painting, but I was happy with the result. Now it was ready for the day of the wedding, when our whole family would come and scruffy it up again! The hairdresser and makeup girls set up their stations. To be fair, they had their work cut out for them. My face had grown a thousand more wrinkles that week alone and my hair was a hard one to tame! But, they did it! The pair of them worked tirelessly till we were all gorgeous. Even my youngest had that much desired pageant make-up she had always desired! She was to be junior bridesmaid and she hadn't slept in weeks with excitement!
The house soon filled with friends, neighbours and relatives and the bubbly was poured. The sun came out and it was a beautiful day. Not a heatwave by no means, but Ireland always has a habit of down-pouring on newly married couples or drizzling down on already miserable mourners while burying their beloved relatives. The rain is supposed to be good luck, but really, how lucky is the bride who's beautifully styled hair has gone all frizzy from the damp? Or indeed, how lucky is the beloved dead person covered in heavy wet muck?
Well in this case the sun was lucky for all us Murray's because everybody was in great form as we headed to the church. It was indeed a beautiful ceremony with the church filled with beautiful flowers and designer guna's. (dresses in Irish!)
As I mentioned before, my youngest child is 11 and although she was delighted to be all dressed up like a bridesmaid from 'My big fat gypsy wedding', she has a few sensory difficulties. While my oldest and his beloved were exchanging vows, my little one was peeling off her eyelashes and asking me to take out her hair pins, for all the church to hear!
We had initially made bets on who would cry first, the bride or the groom, but we were all wrong! My hubby was the one sobbing into the feathers on my fascinator! I didn't cry at all. My husband said I was as hard a stone. No, I was just praying that the bride wouldn't change her mind and say no, and then I'd have the little fecker back home with me again! I was smiling happily when they had signed that registry thingy. No going back now! Yey!
And then it got very chaotic. We all legged it to the venue, which must have been pre-warned for the various personalities arriving. They welcomed us all in with smiles on their faces and prayers in their minds....
And then I vaguely remember feeling like 'Steve Martin' in that great movie, 'Father of the Bride!' I seemed to bob along all over the place mingling with our guests.  I kept arriving late to all the little special moments, cutting the cake, the speeches, the first dances....
As I said before, 'The Mother of the Bride' was a great match for me and we both took to our task of 'Hosts' like fish to water.  We trudged through the crowd like professional cage fighters. We matched any alcoholic with our consumption of wine. We tenderly took care of our older relatives, hurrying them out the door, less we miss any fun. We minded the younger people, in the small hours of the morning making sure they were in their own beds......
We sorted out a little fight or two as we swallowed next years alcohol allowance as well as this years!
And when we finally headed off to be bed at 5.30 in the morning, we had no pyjamas, no tooth brushes, no glasses! And I know I shared my very expensive bed with my mother and two nieces and my hubby had the pull out bed on the floor!
Sure it was great fun!
Am I sad that my son has left me for another woman? Not at all.
I now have a new daughter and a whole new family to invite to my next Doo!
Jean xxx